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Divining my way into 9rules or not?

I intending to submit my blog to 9 Rules Today. A few days ago I used the Tarot to gain some insight, if I had any chance of succeeding or not, and asked for some advice regarding the whole thing.

I used a basic spread of my own, that I named ‘the sacred mountain spread,’ which consists of a central card (corresponding with the World Mountain/Axis Mundi) and four surrounding Cards (corresponding with four surrounding mountains/directions/quarters that mark the boundaries of Cosmic Space.

The Spread

Centre: Nine of Wands

This card seems to have a double meaning. First I should mention that this figure is isolated (either through his own actions or those of others, or a bit of both). He has built a fence, using 8 of the wands, between himself and his enemies (or his perceived enemies at least, as he does look very paranoid), and holds the remaining wand as a weapon to fight off potential intruders. Reading up (mostly from my Beginner’s guide to Tarot and Learning the Tarot: An On-line Course, this card carries the idea of inner determination/strength (reinforced by the Strength card), and that I shouldn’t give up. Yet, I think this central card is addressing my Social Anxiety Disorder. I am isolated from others (both online and off). I set up defences through fear of attack or rejection, due to experiences I’ve had in the past. Would jumping into a community such as 9rules, be too much for me to handle?

East: Eight of Cups

Again another isolated figure walking away from 8 cups, that are symbolic his emotions. The lone figure has set off on a journey towards rocky and mountainous regions under a waning moon. The nine of cups doesn’t really support a reading of inner strength leading to success. I wonder if becoming a member of 9rules will be too emotionally draining.

South: Strength

With the Eight of Cups in mind, this card, symbolizing strength, may indicate that I’ll need great inner strength to succeed as a member of the 9rules community. Strength that (If I’m honest) I really do not have.

West: Five of Swords

Again, this card depicts another man on his own, holding triumphantly the swords of his beaten opponents. I found a revealing statement for this card at the Learning Tarot site: “You are defining your interests too narrowly. If you try to get ahead in isolation, your actions will come back to haunt you later, one way or the other.”

North: Ten of Cups

At first I found this card to be out of place with the other cards, but after reflecting on the spread for some time I think I understand what it is trying to tell me: “Rather than look to the larger blogging community, remain closer to home. You don’t need to be a part of the religious 9rules community either, lumped together with followers of other faiths (Edit: Although thinking about it it would be easier for me to have other Pagan bloggers there already). You’ve identified yourself as Pagan. Now, while ‘Pagan’ can mean a variety of different things you obviously have a connection with other Pagans, so why try to become a part of a community outside of your Pagan ‘family,’ when you only know its going to be a real struggle?”

So, I’ve decided against submitting my blog for 9rules.

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